A “new” company founded 4 years ago

Afraid employees might get bored, the company changes staff assignments every now and then. Of course, the people involved are never informed, in order to add an element of surprise.

Out of consideration for employees who have accumulated too many compensatory leave hours, it is perfectly normal for unused hours to automatically disappear once more than two months have passed since they were accrued.

Even the year-end banquet is planned from the employees’ perspective:

1. Worried that employees might work too late and miss the subway, the grand prize is a taxi fare voucher, so employees can work until midnight without worry.

2. Taking into account that employees might get upset when their compensatory leave hours disappear, the second prize provides compensatory leave hours to make up for the hours that vanished.

3. To spare the people planning the year-end banquet prizes from getting too tired, only two prizes have been established!

4. Not wanting employees to spend too much during the New Year, half of the year-end bonus is paid upfront!

The company also has many outstanding management talents.

Those aspiring to become exploitative bosses or loyal enforcers for exploitative bosses are welcome to join!

The boss and managers will teach you not only how to paint grand visions for employees,

so you can experience an abundance of positive-energy pep talks every day without having to join a multi-level marketing company; in the advanced course, you can even learn psychic divination to see the future and make your grand promises more effective.

A Taiwanese male manager-in-waiting personally comes down to teach various techniques, including:

1. Only use your mouth for everything. Even when employees are off work, on leave, or attending a relative’s funeral, don’t forget to remind them about work through messaging apps. Remember to remind yourself that you chose this “difficult” path entirely for the sake of the employees’ growth.

2. Take credit and shift blame. Learn to identify the right moment to join in or dump an assignment on someone else; combined with trust earned through flattery and managerial authority, this can produce twice the results with half the effort.

3. Maintain a healthy sense of self. Even when assigning employees excessive workloads, tell yourself it is for their growth. If someone complains about wanting overtime pay or compensatory leave, brush it off by saying they have poor work abilities. Even if you are the main reason employees in the department resign or transfer every year, continue to maintain your positive self-affirmation and proclaim everywhere that you are the best manager in the world.

4. Change faces quickly: say one thing in front of people and another behind their backs. It is highly effective for bluffing new employees, dividing current employees, and satisfying yourself!

The HR lady will teach you the correct concept that company-issued orders take precedence over national law; when employees resign, she will put the company first and do everything possible to minimize the expenses that need to be paid.

You will also learn how to package typhoon days off as a benevolent company policy showing consideration for employees.

A warm little reminder:

If you really want to join, you can make up a story during the interview about having been bullied in the past and how you stood back up afterward, to see whether it resonates with the manager-in-waiting and increases their favorable impression of you!

For those who don’t speak Japanese and can’t flatter people, memorize the romanizations of “確かに” (tashika ni) or “そうですね” (sō desu ne). When the Japanese boss or Japanese manager expresses an opinion, just pair one of the above phrases with a nod and you’ll be fine! XOXO ^^

How could there possibly be any? This is a company that gives people a hundredfold growth!